It has been two days back into my regular routines.  However, something seems like its missing.  I hear all these whispers to do this and look there, but my soul wants more God.  I know what it feels like to fall short over and over again and I do not want to be that guy anymore.  I want to fight the good fight and stop fighting myself.  Surrending is a lot harder than you think because every part of you just wants a little more.  I have observed people, including my own life.  We eat to much, talk about our next vacation, what our next car will be, etc. Only a few people really got it when I said they live in the dump and the thing was it didnt really get their attention until I told them that they trade their daughters innocense for garbage.  Then that caught their attention.  Understandably, I have always thought its over there and doesn’t effect me, but was I ever wrong this is more than pictures on a documentary. They are real children I have played in a playground with and hugged.  My everyday routines seem very pointless as my heart is aching for more.  The poverty of the world outside of America calls for deep and anchored faith.  My everyday routines need to change.  Please Papa open the eyes of my heart that I may see how you see your Beloved! Selah